C & S Mommy

Monday, October 17, 2005

Cecilia's First Real B-day Pary/My Worst Nightmare

Since Cecilia turned five this year, Keith and I decided that it was time she have her first birthday party with her friends from school. We have been trying to figure out what kind of party to have and where, as there are 17 boys and girls in her class. After pricing a bunch of places and deciding they were way too expensive, we convinced Cecilia to have a girls only party at home. For weeks I have been making tiaras out of beads, pipe cleaners, and headbands. My mom made little tool skirts with ribbons and I found these cute snap braceletes with a big pink flower on it. I had visions of the girls walking in picking out a costume set and running around ribbons flying in their wake. We planned the party for just the right amount of time (an hour and a half) to allow the girls to do a craft, open presents, eat cake, break a pinata, and go home. I sent out the invitations with an RSVP request and waited. One person responded from Cecilia's class and the girl from next door responded. People in the South are terrible about RSVPing so I didn't think too much about it at first. As the party drew closer I asked several people for their opinions about contacting these people to see if they were coming. Everyone told me that I shouldn't because people in the South don't RSVP. I did call one girl's mom because I has to respond to the adult party she was throwing (some dumb ass tupperware-type party). I left message asking her to call me back and let me know if her daughter would attend. Nothing. Anyway...One girl showed up to Cecilia's party. ONE GIRL! My heart broke for her. No that's a lie...my heart broke for me. All the planning, all the excitment of having her first party, all the money... Cecilia, on the other hand, was fine. She had a great time with the girl from her class and the girl next door (who had to leave early). She made mention of the other girls a couple of times but was not upset. After the girl left and Keith was opening the packages from her gifts, I hid in the kitchen with my sister and cried. Later Cecilia said to me, "Mommy I wish the other girls could have come to my party but that's okay maybe they can come next October when I turn six." I don't know if I have mentioned how wonderful I think my daughter is.
Keith said it best when he said that at this age it is not about the kids it is about the parents. That is so true. Now I have to face these shitty ass people in two weeks for a Halloween event at the school and I don't know what I am going to do. I feel so disrespected that they didn't even think enough to call to say they were not going to come. I am just thankful that it happened this year when Cecilia is still young enough not to be hurt by it.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Angry Angry Angry

This is one of those weeks when I feel like I want to rip everyone's head off for very little reason. I am so damn sensitive and everything seems to be setting me off. Keith and I have done nothing but fight which is making me so depressed especially yesterday because it was Cecilia's birthday and we should have been celebrating how lucky we are to have a healthy, happy child. All week I have been trying to count my blessings and snap out of it but it is just not working. UUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGG!